Around the hoods, part 2

Zoey and I do a longish walk around our community twice a day.  After a frightening experience in a nearby community last summer, I stick to our two block "neighborhood" for walks.

Each walk is pleasantly interrupted by short talks with neighbors, visiting one neighor's garden or just catching up with gossip. I like this superficial friendly onnectedeness.  Most recently, at twilight, I fell in step with neighbors, a married couple I've never known well.  They were delightful to talk to, and we have much in common.  Yet, she was a non-stop talker about everything and everyone  and I was glad our walk didn't go beyond 10 minutes.

Yesterday, as the "heat dome" kept almost everyone inside, I passed our long winded 90-something neighbor on his hands and knees digging out weeds from his gravel driveway.  He takes great pride in doing most everything he has always done.  There is something to be said for that.  Amazingly, they live in a three story home with a basement that is his office - and he goes there daily to write his memoirs.

Up and down the stairs...that's tempting fate my mother would say.

Around the 'hoods, part 1

Our cottage on the Chesapeake is unnecessary, really.  Our kids are too busy to go there more than once or twice a summer, usually when we cajole them down for a crab feast.  Still, I love to drive there alone, walk Zoey, talk with neighbors, and admire the new osprey platform that was finally installed.

No good deed goes entirely unpunished, however. Pushing the concept through the HOA was slow....then the application was draconian.  I tried to dot my i's by tracking down and calling  contingent homeowners on the creek front (the platform would be out in the creek).  I drew up a rough map to show the technician who would install the platform where it would go....

Then a snafu.  As the application progressed, one homeowner objected to my map (a rough drawing for installation purposes), saying it didn't show his ownership of the land abuting the creek (most property there is non-riparian).  That stalled the project sufficiently so that the narrow time frame for ospreys to nest on the platform passed.

At least it was installed.  The objecting homeowner has been  polite but frosty toward me ever since. Crazily, the platform is best viewed from his property so a community-sponsored project has benefited  him most!

At the Beach

How's this for contradictions?  I'm a water person but not a "beach" person.  I don't like the sticky sandy messiness of our Atlantic ocean beaches although I remember fondly last winter watching dolphins jump as I sat on the Gulf of Mexico beach in Florida.

Here's the difference: crowds and stifling heat and suntan lotion that congeals with the inevitable sand.  That's the negative.

Still, the "beach" for many Americans is the quintessential vacation.

Carrying this image in my mind, I drove to our son's place on the beach 2 hours away.  He was there alone with his two daughters (his wife was working and my husband was working on a deadline for large projects).  He loves the beach; the girls not so much. Too sticky, sandy and boring.

We did all the usual things in the 2 days I was there - boardwalk, ice cream, going down to watch the sunset and lighting those color sticks.  He is such a good dad and someday I hope the girls appreciate the memories he made for them.

When things fall apart, part 2

While my daughter was visiting here for one night and coping with impossible situations of her own making, I was having my own disaster control.

My husband and I arrived late last night from the west coast.  Mistake number one: we flew into an airport we didn't fly out of.  We drove our car to the first airport and left it there instead of taking a cab.   Don't ever do that !!!  Now we have to drive up to airport number one and and get it.

Then our "extra" old car wouldn't start due to a dead battery.  My husband left one of the tuning signals on .....Triple A came out but the guy said the battery was completely dead and would be hard to resurrect.  The battery was only 3 months old but I bought a new battery and had him install it.Got THAT off my plate, anyway.

Before this car issue even hit my awareness, I fed Zoey her breakfast but couldn't find her Prozac.  It was left at the vets when my husband boarded her before the pet sitter came.  The vets didn't give it back in her doggy bag and neither my husband or my pet sitter noticed.  Prozac should not be stopped like that.  Damn.  But she seems fine.


Then my cleaning woman called and said she would be late. Late?  I forgot I rescheduled her for today!!!  She arrived with her daughter who parked her car in a spot in front of our house.  Backing out to run an errand, I sideswiped her daughter's car.  No dents, just paint.  Daughter looked like she would cry.  I said, get an estimate, I will pay for it.  She still looked like she would cry and said she would get an estimate and left.

Then I walked our yard and noticed that all the expensive stuff I put up to deter deer didn't work.  No daylilies this year...the deer ate most.

Well, things can always be worse.  And I try to keep all this in perspective.  What bothers me is what bothers our daughter.  Some stuff is avoidable, like hitting a parked car.  Some isn't, like deer foraging in the yard.....

When things fall apart

Our daughter is an accomplished professional but somewhat scattered and tends to over-schedule, as does my husband.  Daughter lives on the West Coast but comes east for meetings.

When she is here, I feel as if everything dissolves into chaos and crises.

This trip was a disaster for her.   She had a morning meeting at a Federal agency in suburban Maryland and could have actually just stayed in a hotel right there and turned around and gone back to her home on the west coast.  However, she decided to stay one more day and see her brother and nieces who live nearby.  First of all, we were not here.  Our good car was at the airport.  Our old car's battery was dead. So she couldn't get around once she got to our house the second night.  Her brother who lives nearby picked her up and she went over there (taking Zoey with her).  But first she stayed in DC before going to her meeting.  She flew in to an airport that was cheaper but then she wasted time and money getting to DC for her hotel.  Then the next day she had to take a variety of public transportation from DC to get to suburban Maryland.  Then more public transportation to get here.

It gets worse.  This was an important meeting with big guns attending. She was so revved up the day before from the travel with a 3 hour time difference, she couldn't sleep in the hotel.  She got 2 hours sleep.  She felt she didn't perform well at the meeting and make a statement that the biggys disagreed with.  She left the meeting frustrated.

This morning she looked at her return ticket and saw she booked a different airport at a later time to fly home.  Then she dissolved , saying she is not organized, can't keep track of time or space, despite multiple efforts.  I tried to suggest coping strategies but that made her madder.  She said she has done everything she can...has a professional organizer, has a tech organizer, has all kind of books, etc.

All I could say was, you have strengths in different areas. You can't be perfect....etc.

Well, she wasn't happy with whatever I said but she made lemonade out of lemons by calling an old friend  and getting together with her in the extra time before she departed.

In the meantime, my day was also crisis management.

An Unusual Fourth

My husband and I typically don't celebrate the 4th of July in any big way. We almost never travel due to traffic, prices and general chaos.  Even getting to our downtown parade and fireworks requires shuttle buses.

This year we planned an especially quiet holiday since we had spent the preceding Thursday and Friday driving to an out of town  family funeral.

Our niece had just last week moved to the area after graduating from college and getting a job in a nearby engineering firm.  Thinking she might be lonely, we had asked if she wanted to come over for the 4th but she said she had college friends coming down.  Then on the third, she texted us asking what we were doing.  The friends had gone back home.

Well, our son and family were out of town and I wondered if spending time with us might be a little boring for her....But I invited her over.  She said yes.

My husband and I debated what to do with her....it was rainyish out.  We decided to go to our Bay cottage since we could have a picnic at the pavillion by the creek.  I raced out to Whole Foods for picnic food: crab meat, corn on the cob, salad, watermelon, cookies, etc.  Made crab cakes and prepped the corn on the cob, packed it all up.  She said she'd bring over a board game. Apparently they had a board game and wine night at her college.

We had a terrific time. The anticipated heavy rain was merely drizzly so we ate, walked Zoey around the community, talked with the few neighbors who were out, looked at the new osprey platform and played a board game called Packo (I think).  It was fun and something I could buy to play with the grandkids.